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Choosing Your Baby's Sex FAQ
Last-Modified: January 19, 1996
5
This is the misc.kids / misc.kids.pregnancy FAQ
(Frequently Asked Questions) file "Choosing Your
Baby's Sex FAQ."
NOTE:
[Since the "database" of responses is small, I
am still accepting anyone's responses for
inclusion in future editions of the FAQ. Please
email me, Roger Hunt, at
rah@gvsu.edu
if you'd like to share your experiences with
Shettles or any other sex-selection methods. I
will also save follow-up posts to this one; but
email is preferable!]
TABLE OF CONTENTS
1.1 Copyright Notice, Authorship, Disclaimer, and
Legal Sludge in General
1.2 What's This FAQ About?
1.3 Where Did This FAQ Come From?
2.1 Summary of Shettles Methods
2.2 A Note About Overall Fertility
3.1 Original Call for FAQ Answers
3.2 Summary of Responses to Call for FAQ Answers
3.3 Individual Responses to Call for FAQ Answers,
plus Miscellaneous Posts on this Subject
1.1 COPYRIGHT NOTICE, AUTHORSHIP, DISCLAIMER, AND
LEGAL SLUDGE IN GENERAL
Copyright 1996, Roger A. Hunt. Use and copying of
this information are permitted as long as (1) no
fees or compensation are charged for use, copies or
access to this information, and (2) this copyright
notice is included intact.
Authorship: This FAQ is compiled and maintained by
Roger Hunt -- semi-frequent misc.kids and
misc.kids.pregnancy contributor; college professor
of geography and planning (*not* of biology,
although I do teach a course on population
fertility); AND spouse for one wife, dad for two
kids, with a 3rd baby on the way (as of this
writing!) Whenever you see the "I" "me" "my"
references in this FAQ, they usually refer to me,
Roger -- except in Section 3.3, of course.
Disclaimer: This is information collected from many
sources and while I have strived to be accurate and
complete, I cannot guarantee that I have succeeded.
This is not medical advice. For that, see your
doctor or other health care provider.
1.2 WHAT'S THIS FAQ ABOUT?
For a long time now (tens of thousands of years
would be my guess), people have wanted to know if
it's possible to influence the sex of a baby before
conception. Just as it's natural that the first
question your family and friends ask upon hearing
about a new baby is often "Boy or girl?" -- it's
also natural that you and/or your partner would
wonder "How can we influence whether the baby we
conceive is a boy or a girl?"
This FAQ is an attempt at answering this basic
question. Based on the sources in section 1.3
below, there is some evidence that you can alter the
odds. Instead of a near-50/50 "roll of the dice,"
you may be able to increase the odds in favor of
conceiving either a girl or a boy to as high as 80
percent, or as low as 50.0001 percent (depending on
whom you believe, as outlined below.)
BIG FAT WARNING, though: Scientific tests,
other than those of Shettles himself and his
associates, do not at this point establish that
the Shettles methods (or any others) are valid.
In fact, there are purportedly studies showing
that trying the Shettles techniques may increase
your odds of conceiving the OTHER sex! -- though
finding these studies seems to be an elusive
task. In any event, be forewarned.
1.3 WHERE DID THIS FAQ COME FROM?
It is primarily based on three sources:
a) A summary of the premier book on this subject:
_How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby_, by Dr.
Landrum B. Shettles, MD, and David M. Rorvik.
Published by Doubleday & Co.; copyright 1984.
NOTE: There is a newer edition of Shettles'
book, but I haven't seen it yet!
b) Responses to a "call for FAQ information" posted
several times on misc.kids and
misc.kids.pregnancy during September and
October, 1995.
c) Various independently-posted items during 1995
on misc.kids and misc.kids.pregnancy.
Concerning part (b) above: In the process of
deciding whether and how my wife and I should
proceed with having our 3rd baby, I asked for
others' experiences with methods, both Dr. Shettles'
techniques and others, concerning choosing your
baby's sex. The question I asked was if any method
or methods were successful in improving the odds of
getting either a boy or a girl. After getting some
encouraging responses (many of which are reproduced
anonymously below), and after seeing others post the
same question, I thought it was time for a FAQ. So
I posted my original "call for FAQ information,"
Section 3.1 below.
2.1 SUMMARY OF SHETTLES METHODS
The following summary of the methods outlined in Dr.
Shettles' book is based partly on an excellent
summary posted by misc.kids.pregnancy contributor
Ana Silva in September 1995, and partly on my
modifications. Thanks for permission, Ana!
BEGIN SHETTLES SUMMARY
Basically, men produce two types of sperms, the X
(female) and Y (male). According to Dr. Shettles'
studies the y-sperms are smaller, weaker, but faster
than their siblings x-sperms, which are bigger,
stronger, but slower.
Based on this fact, there are several things you can
do to "favor" the conception of boys or girls:
(1) The most important aspect of all is timing of
intercourse during the monthly cycle. The closer to
ovulation you have sex, the better the chances to
have a boy, because the y-sperms are faster and tend
to get to the egg first. If you have sex 3 days or
more before ovulation, the better your chances to
conceive a girl, because the weaker y-sperms tend to
die sooner and the x-sperms will be available in
greater quantity whenever the egg is released. On
the other hand, having sex from 2 days before
ovulation, through a few days after ovulation, is
better for conceiving a boy. Around the 2-day point
-- 48 hours before ovulation -- seems to be the
50/50 mark.
(2) The pH of the women's tract is also very
important. A more acidic environment favors girls,
since it will kill the weaker y-sperms first,
leaving a greater quantity of x-sperms available to
fertilize the egg. On the other hand, a more
alkaline environment favors boys. Shettles
recommends a douche of water and vinegar (acid)
immediately before intercourse to favor a girl; a
douche of water and baking soda (alkaline) will help
for a boy.
(Don't try this without reading Shettles! You
have to dilute the douches properly, according
to his formula, or they won't help and might
hurt you.)
Note: Some women are naturally very acidic and have
a hard time conceiving boys.
(3) Position of intercourse and depth of penetration
are important, partly because of pH. The closer to
the entrance to the vagina, the more acidic the
women's tract is. Also, deep penetration places the
sperm closer to the egg, and gives those aggressive
boy sperms a head start :-). So, a shallow
penetration will favor girls and a deeper will favor
boys. Shettles recommends missionary-position for a
girl, and rear-entry (dog-style) for a boy.
(4) Women's orgasms can also be important. It also
has to do with pH. When a woman has an orgasm, the
body releases some kind of substance that makes the
environment more alkaline, favoring boys. He
recommends no orgasms when trying for girls!
(5) The sperm count is another factor. Obviously, a
low sperm count to begin with doesn't favor either
sex. But a high sperm count favors boys. Shettles
recommends three things:
(a) When trying for a boy, don't have sex for 3-
4 days before you reach the target date a day or two
before ovulation! For girls, have sex everyday from
day=1 or day=5 ("cleaner" :-)), and stop 3 days
before ovulation.
(b) Shettles recommends that for boys, the man
wear loose underwear only -- that is, men who
usually wear briefs or other tight underwear should
switch to boxers. The idea is the same as wearing
boxers to increase overall fertility -- the
testicles need cooler temperatures for sperms to
survive, and the Y-sperms, since they are weaker,
will be helped more than the X-sperms by this
method. However, Shettles does NOT recommend the
opposite, that men wear briefs for a girl -- this
will just decrease overall fertility.
(c) Also, for a girl, the man is supposed to
take a hot bath immediately before intercourse.
"Room temperature" is fine for a boy. The idea is
the same as the briefs versus boxers -- give the X-
sperms an advantage.
(6) Finally, in trying for a boy, Shettles
recommends a nice cup of caffeinated coffee for the
man, right before sex -- he isn't clear on how or
why this works, but apparently it gives the Y-sperms
a jolt!
Well, these are the big ones. Read the book for
other details. If you can determine the time of
ovulation and follow the rules presented in his
book, Dr. Shettles claims a success rate of 70-75%
for girls and 75-80% for boys (better than the
normal 50%). As you see, it's not 100%!!!
Also, Shettles recommends a "practice" period of 3-6
months, to make sure the couple has all the
techniques down properly.
END SHETTLES SUMMARY
2.2 A NOTE ABOUT OVERALL FERTILITY
Many of Shettles' methods are also valid (and
scientifically accepted) methods for increasing or
decreasing overall fertility. It's beyond the scope
of this FAQ to cover all aspects of fertility, but
paying attention to the following elements is
certainly relevant:
A key to increasing fertility overall is
charting time of ovulation during every monthly
cycle. The three most common methods for
determining ovulation are:
(1) charting basal body
temperature (BBT) (2) charting changes in cervical
mucus
(3) using an ovulation test-kit.
There are many good resources for obtaining
information on all these methods, and on increasing
fertility in general.
Regarding sex selection in particular, it is
beyond question that having sex very close to the
time of ovulation is an important way to increase
the overall odds for conception. Other methods that
are known to increase odds for conception include:
deep penetration at the time of ejaculation; for
women, having an orgasm together with or following
the man's orgasm; for men, wearing boxers instead of
briefs; and for men, avoiding hot baths or hot tubs.
As you'll note, all of these also correspond
with methods that favor boys, according to Shettles.
In fact, he cautions that conceiving a girl may take
considerably longer than conceiving a boy, *and* may
take longer than conceiving using no techniques at
all.
The Point: If you have trouble conceiving in
general, or think you might have such trouble, the
techniques for choosing a girl baby might not be for
you -- unless you're willing to be patient!
[NOTE from Roger: I think my next project will
be a FAQ on "low-tech" ways to enhance fertility
-- i.e., what you can do at home, before you
seek medical advice! This is a frequently-
asked-about topic on misc.kids.pregnancy]
3.1 ORIGINAL CALL FOR FAQ ANSWERS
Here is the text of my original call:
Please let me hear from you! I (we) would like to
know your experience with the following:
1. Did you want to try to get a boy or a girl
with any pregnancy, in advance of conception?
2. Did you try any (or all) of the techniques
outlined by Dr. Shettles in his book? If so,
which ones? Please describe.
3. Did you try any other techniques besides
those in the Shettles book?
4. Did you get pregnant as a result? What
gender was the fetus or baby (or babies, if
multiples)?
5. Did you find that any of Shettles' (or
other) methods presented any difficulties for
you or your partner? Please describe.
6. Overall, would you say you were satisfied
with the whole thing? (Did you get the
"outcome" that you wanted?)
7. Any other comments?
And, a few procedural things:
Feel free to e-mail me with your answers. I
know some of this is kinda personal, so I promise to
anonymize all the responses before I save them for
the FAQ (strip out headers, change any names in the
body of the text, and all that, per usual FAQ
procedure.) You can even send me your e-mail
anonymously if you know how to do that.
You can also post to either misc.kids or
misc.kids.pregnancy, and I'll save any responses I
see to this thread on either group. BUT: E-mail is
preferable! to help our already high-traffic groups
stay manageable in size.
3.2 SUMMARY OF RESPONSES TO CALL FOR FAQ ANSWERS
Overall, the experience on misc.kids and
misc.kids.pregnancy has tended to be more positive
than negative. Overall, the responses to date
indicate that around 70 percent of all "tries" or
outcomes resulted in a "success -- a baby of the
desired gender! This is a small and definitely NON-
random sample, and all *could* have been due to
chance, of course; nevertheless this unscientific
survey seems to indicate that Shettles' claims have
some validity.
By far the most commonly used method was the timing
of intercourse. Nearly everyone who responded used
this method, and most had successful results with
it.
The second-most common technique was the position
and/or depth of intercourse, which was also
successful according to responses -- in fact, the
position/depth was the most successful technique of
all, proportionally, in obtaining the desired baby!
The other Shettles techniques were tried less than
five times, so generalizations have to be more
cautious. However, all three techniques produced
more successful than unsuccessful outcomes.
Here are some summary statistics:
21 = Total individuals responses to date
26 = Total "outcomes" -- i.e., total of all
conceptions by those who tried any of
the Shettles techniques, or any other
sex-selection technique(s)
NOTE: Some folks who responded hadn't tried
Shettles; some tried Shettles multiple
times; and some reported friends' Shettles
tries! Therefore, all the statistics below
are based on number of outcomes, not number
of people.
21+ 5 = Number of outcomes that were successful
(a baby or babies of the sex wanted)
+ number of outcomes that were
unsuccessful
19+ 6 = Number of successful + unsuccessful
outcomes including the following
Shettles method: timing of
intercourse
1+ 1 = Number of successful + unsuccessful
outcomes including the following
Shettles method: acidic / alkaline
douching
6+ 1 = Number of successful + unsuccessful
outcomes including the following
Shettles method: position of
intercourse / depth of penetration
3+ 1 = Number of successful + unsuccessful
outcomes including the following
Shettles method: orgasm / no orgasm
for woman
4+ 0 = Number of successful + unsuccessful
outcomes including the following
Shettles method: hot bath / boxers
for man
1+ 0 = Number of successful + unsuccessful
outcomes including the following
Shettles method: coffee for man
3.3 INDIVIDUAL RESPONSES TO CALL FOR FAQ ANSWERS,
PLUS MISCELLANEOUS POSTS ON THIS SUBJECT
NOTE: Most of these are actual responses to my call
for FAQ answers; a few are posts on misc.kids and/or
misc.kids.pregnancy. I have made no changes except
to strip out all identifying information, plus a few
minor formatting changes.
It can be done. The 'technique' uses the basis
premise that the y sperms are fast and mobile and
the x sperms are less mobile, but more long-lasting.
So, the deal is that the closer that you can time
intercourse to the time of ovulation, the better
chances you have of having a boy. Because the little
boy sperms are going to swim right up there, and get
there first. But, if you time intercourse for a few
days BEFORE ovulation, the little boy sperms have
all swum their hearts out and are dead. But the
little girl sperms are meandering their way up the
vagina/fallopian tubes, and so when ovulation
occurs, they're there.
I'll tell you my experience. My first child was a
girl, and what they call, 'an accident.' I had been
taking precautions, but obviously, not good enough.
Those 'little girl' sperms stayed around long enough
to do the deed. But with my second child, I wanted a
boy, to round out the family. So, I got this book,
and followed their advice. Fortunately, for me,
after my first pregnancy, my periods regulated
themselves so that I could almost tell, precisely,
when I was actually ovulating, with the mucous
excretions, and such. So, for my boy, we timed
intercourse to match EXACTLY with those signs. And
lo and behold, we had a boy.
In trying for a girl, it's a little more tricky. You
have to time intercourse for about three days BEFORE
ovulation. That way, the little boy sperms will have
died, but the little girls will still be around.
Hey, it's worth a shot. It worked, for me. But get
the book and read what those doctors say.
Funny you should ask. When we decided to go ahead
with number three, we thought it would be fun to
'try' for a boy. A friend recommended book. I checked it out of the library.
It outlines methods to try for a boy or girl, mostly
based on timing. The book claims 80% effectivness.
We fall in the 20% noneffective, which is perfectly
fine, I love little girls! :)
There are also ovulation kits you can buy OTC, which
claim to be able to try for a particular gender.
BTW, I have this theory that the more children that
a couple has of one particular gender, the greater
likelihood that subsequent children will also be of
that gender.
Yes, I read Shettles book and was going to try for a
girl. We were using Natural Family Planning (sort
of) and weren't really trying to conceive, but did.
I did chart many signs though and can relay them
for your study.
We had intercourse 5 days before my temperature rose
(girl). I did not say "ovulated" because it is
hard to say exactly when ovulation occurred. We
did it from behind (boy) and I did not orgasm
(girl). We did not have intercourse again for about
a week and used a condom. We had a baby boy.
According to Shettles, I think it should have been
a girl.
My friend also uses Natural Family Planning, and
used her temp and mucous to have intercourse 2 days
before ovulation, hoping for a girl. She is having
a boy. (I do not know any of her other signals.)
I would be interested to know if anyone had
luck/experience using a douche. I have heard of
these for either boys or girls.
7. Any other comments?
I was not trying for any sex in particular, but we
had intercourse and conceived either on or shortly
after ovulation. We had a boy so this supports what
Shettles says about timing.
1. Did you want to try to get a boy or a girl
with any pregnancy, in advance of conception?
We very much wanted a girl.
2. Did you try any (or all) of the techniques
outlined by Dr. Shettles in his book? If so, which
ones? Please describe.
We pretty much tried to do all of them: timing (I
think it was two days prior to ovulation - oh, and I
"charted" BBT for about three months before we
started "trying"); position (shallow penetration);
no orgasm for me. I didn't do a douche, and my diet
tends toward "pro-girl" (dairy, beans, etc.) anyway.
There's another book about selecting your baby's
gender, written by . Basically the diet thing is related to
the pH factor and is pretty simple: for a girl, lots
of legumes and dairy, and for a boy, more meat and
salt.
3. Did you try any other techniques besides those
in the Shettles book?
see above. we also, at the crucial moment, said
"Think GIRL!"
4. Did you get pregnant as a result? What gender
was the fetus or baby (or babies, if multiples)?
Pregnant on first try, and it was (and is) a girl.
5. Did you find that any of Shettles' (or other)
methods presented any difficulties for you or your
partner? Please describe.
nope
6. Overall, would you say you were satisfied with
the whole thing? (Did you get the "outcome" that
you wanted?)
yeah, and yeah, though I don't know how much was
just chance (and my family leans heavily towards
girls, so that may be a factor as well).
Here are my responses to your post re: choosing the
sex of your baby.
1. Yes, we wanted a girl with this (current -- six
months along) pregnancy. WE already have a boy.
2. We used Shettles book and mainly relied on BBT
and guessing at my cycles to predict ovulation. I
don't have much cerv. mucus so that was hard to use.
So, anticipating my ovulation date, we had sex 3
days prior to ovulation.
3. No other techniques.
4. Yes, pregnant now with a girl on the first try.
5. Not really any difficulties.
6. Yes, very very satisfied! A no-cost, painless
way to (maybe) get our girl. Of course, we'll never
know, but my attitude was it can't hurt to try. By
the way, I called an ob/gyn I know to ask about
Shettles and he said his opinion was you can "tip
the scales" a little, like maybe up your odds to
55/45 or 60/40, with the Shettles method.
I'll be interested to hear others' experiences.
Also if people plan to keep trying even if it means
expanding their families beyond their ideals. We
had firmly decided that two was IT whether this one
was a boy or girl. I'm just happy to have my
on the way.
I'd be interested in the stats, even if it's not a
true statistical sample! BTW, my husband and I were
talking about this recently, and he brought up the
fact that the people who try this method are the
very people who probably have a higher chance of
having one particular gender of baby. Good point,
eh?
1. Did you want to try to get a boy or a girl
with any pregnancy, in advance of conception?
A boy
2. Did you try any (or all) of the techniques
outlined by Dr. Shettles in his book? If so, which
ones? Please describe.
Yes, we followed the advice exactly. Observed
cervical secretions (I also did basal temperature
for confirmation, and it did confirm ovulation as I
had predicted it) ; timed I/C for the exact day of
ovulation; douched with (??) baking soda sol'n;
hubby had a big 44 oz diet coke before (in lieu of
coffee); and the appropriate position (??) doggie
style.
3. Did you try any other techniques besides those
in the Shettles book?
No
4. Did you get pregnant as a result? What gender
was the fetus or baby (or babies, if multiples)?
Yes, pregnancy was acheived in one month, and we had
a third baby girl :-)
5. Did you find that any of Shettles' (or other)
methods presented any difficulties for you or your
partner? Please describe.
Nope
6. Overall, would you say you were satisfied with
the whole thing? (Did you get the "outcome" that
you wanted?)
Well, we did it for the fun of it, so it didn't
matter that we didn't get a boy. (besides, we never
had to make the cir- (won't complete that word)
decision!
1. Did you want to try to get a boy or a girl
with any pregnancy, in advance of conception?
Yes, we were trying for a boy with our 3rd. (We had
2 daughters already)
2. Did you try any (or all) of the techniques
outlined by Dr. Shettles in his book? If so, which
ones? Please describe.
I used the method of altering the alkalinity of the
vagina which is supposed to favor the life of one
sperm over another. I used a baking-soda douch
before intercourse.
3. Did you try any other techniques besides
those in the Shettles book?
Timing: I tried to time conception as close to
ovulation as I could.
4. Did you get pregnant as a result? What
gender was the fetus or baby (or babies, if
multiples)?
Yes - we had our son in May of .
5. Did you find that any of Shettles' (or other)
methods presented any difficulties for you or your
partner? Please describe.
No, it was really fairly simple.
6. Overall, would you say you were satisfied
with the whole thing? (Did you get the "outcome"
that you wanted?)
Yes
7. Any other comments?
I think it's important to note that in doing this
there are NO GUARANTEES and you have to enter into
it with the mindset that you will welcome a child of
the either sex regardless of the outcome. (ie: You
should have a baby because you want another child,
NOT because you are trying for a given sex)
1. Did you want to try to get a boy or a girl
with any pregnancy, in advance of conception?
Yes.
2. Did you try any (or all) of the techniques
outlined by Dr. Shettles in his book? If so, which
ones? Please describe.
Yes. Charted BBT and mucus, and timed intercourse
to hopefully be 3 days before ovulations.
3. Did you try any other techniques besides those
in the Shettles book?
No.
4. Did you get pregnant as a result? What gender
was the fetus or baby (or babies, if multiples)?
Yes. Female.
5. Did you find that any of Shettles' (or other)
methods presented any difficulties for you or your
partner? Please describe.
Not really.
6. Overall, would you say you were satisfied with
the whole thing? (Did you get the "outcome" that
you wanted?)
Yes, we were satisfied (we got the girl we wanted).
But we would have been satisfied with _any_ live
baby, no matter what the gender.
Okey, I'll try to answer your questions.
Before our first child there were no discussion.
Suddenly one day we said YES we want a child. I
thought it was too late that period, the day after
ovulation, but I was wrong. One "try" and I was
pregnant.
To my surprise a baby boy was born. I hadn't read
Shettles then.
One year later we tried for a girl. I had full
control over my ovulation after checking BBT for a
while. My periods were regular. We had sex 3 days
before ovulation for two months but no - I didn't
became pregnant. We thought we should give it one
more try before the "rabbit-method". And YES I
became pregnant!!! Due to chance or science - it was
a Girl!!!
After that i told my friends about it. Two of them,
both mothers to boys, tried the same method and both
of them gave birth to girls. Which, of course, made
me very happy!
Another friend of mine who has one girl and then one
boy tried for another girl. #3 was a boy.
I don't know if I believe in Shettle's method or not
but if I ever try for another baby, I will use the
method.
To answer shortly to your question about if we used
any other of Shettles methods than "timing", the
answer is no. Not on purpose anyway.
For what it's worth, here's what probably amounts to
an urban myth, but one that turned out to be true
(maybe) in our case. Right before we conceived our
daughter, my husband had taken a loooong, *hot*
bath. I read or heard somewhere, after the fact,
that sperm carrying the Y chromosome are more heat
sensitive than sperm carrying the X. My husband was
at room temperature, so to speak, when we conceived
#2, and voila: a boy. Of course, any number of
variables probably had a lot more to do with the
outcomes...
.. what could be an important[:-)] variable: *I*
had soaked in the hot tub before my husband did.
Despite the 'failures' that have also been
reported in this thread, I still hold a lot of stock
with Shettle's methods. It makes intuitive sense, to
me. For the 'failures,' ie the woman who conceived
the girl right at ovulation, there are other
factors, which Shettle's takes into account. The
primary one being the Ph factor of the woman's
vaginal tract secretions. As I recall, acidic likes
the little girl sperms and the opposite, the little
boy ones. And some women are just generally acidic.
No matter what, they'll only conceive girls, just
the way their bodies are. And perhaps for ,
her body is such that her secretions give the little
boy sperms the advantage.
This subject pops up now and then (pun!) on
misc.kids.pregnancy. I asked the same question not
too long ago. The short answer is "probably not".
Our pediatrician and my wife's OB/GYN guy feel this
way.
What I heard from other netters is: The sperm
carrying X chromosomes are slower, but more durable
than sperm carrying Y chromosomes. If you're trying
for a girl, you'd have intercourse a couple of days
_before_ ovulation, using a missionary position that
allows for shallow penetration, the theory being
that the more durable sperm carrying the X
chromosome will last longer and outperform the
faster, but weaker, Y chromosome sperm. If you're
trying for a boy, you'd have intercourse _at_
ovulation, using a deeply penetrating position, so
the fast Y sperm would get to the egg first... Arf.
There was also some speculation that the X
chromosome sperm survived better in an acidic
environment, Y sperm in a basic environment, hence
the talk you may hear about vinegar douches...
I can't vouch for any of this, and my gut feeling is
that if you _do_ actually make a difference, it's
probably on the order of 50.00001 vs. 49.99999
rather than 51/49.
My wife and I gave up on timing ovulation, etc. We
just try to not be too damn worn out when asleep...!
Best of luck!
Keep in mind that _any_ baby is the right baby,
_your_ baby!
When I was in two years ago, I visited a
private hospital and noticed the advertisment on the
hospital wall. They claimed that they can help
select the sex of the baby. My Thai relatives also
suggested me to pay a visit to Thai fertility doctor
so that I my next baby would be boy. I have two
girls and no intention of having another baby (boy
nor girl). So, I just laughed it off. I also
remember a few years back, 20/20 or one of those
similar show did a story on Thai doctor who discover
the the sex selection method which have high
successfull rate. I can't quote exact data, It's
been long time. But I guess it works, that why most
of the private hospitals in Thailand offer this
service.
One more things, though, it seems that most of
people who use this sex selection service are hoping
for boy. The requirement for the parent to be is
that they must already have at least 2 girls before
receiving this treatment (according to the TV show
mention above). This is to balance the female/male
population. I don't know whether this requirement
is still hold true or not. May be I should check it
out next time I visit Thailand, just in case :-)
About sex selection:
I've just completed a Ph.D. dissertation on sex
ratios of newborn rats, and have a pretty good
handle on the literature (even for humans!). The
"speedy Y, hardy X" theory has not held up. In the
aggregate, the studies on timing of intercourse
suggest an opposite effect: intercourse several
days before ovulation produces males, and
intercourse immediately before ovulation produces
females. But these effects are very slight, if they
are even there. My favorite study set out to test
the "speedy Y, hardy X" theory and gave prospective
parents instructions for how to proceed for the
child of their choice -- and 69% of them got a child
of the OTHER sex.
By the way, for what it's worth, rats have more
males in their litters when they mate early in the
evening, and females when they mate closer to
ovulation (rat cycles are four days long, not four
weeks, so we measure timing of mating relative to
ovulation in terms of hours, not days). However,
the skewing occurs through loss of pups after
implantation, and not at conception.
I have two children and both times we were trying I
*know* we had intercourse about 2 days *before* I
ovulated. We have two girls! It worked for us and we
weren't even trying for a specific sex.
I had heard that hot baths can cause problems for
the mans fertility. My husband loved hot baths and
was cut off from them while we were trying to get me
pregnant.
For our first baby we didn't know about Shettles and
we weren't trying for either a boy or girl. We also
didn't know when my wife ovulated. We did use some
of the methods that were in Shettles' book, as we
found out later -- these were position (rear-entry),
penetration (deep), woman's orgasm (yes), no hot
baths for me, and I was wearing boxers for part of
the time leading up to conception (I have always
switched back & forth between boxers and briefs,
which probably confused those poor sperms
hopelessly!) Of course all of these would favor a
boy. Our first baby was (and is) a boy.
For our 2nd, we did want a girl but we still didn't
know about Shettles. We were timing ovulation by
the cervical-mucous method, and in hope of
increasing the odds for overall conception we used
the "rabbit method" -- sex every night starting 2
days before ovulation, through 3-4 days afterward.
The other techniques were the same as the first
time, except that position was sometimes missionary
and other times rear-entry (we don't know exactly
which time was the magic time.) Our 2nd was also a
boy!
As for Number 3, we won't know if it's a girl or a
boy until the ultrasound in mid-January. We DID
know about Shettles this time, and wanted to try for
a girl. But, thinking of September as a "practice
month," we did it all wrong! We quit using the
condoms 2-3 days *after* ovulation, thinking that
the chance of conception was small. Ooops. The
timing was of course after ovulation (which favors a
boy); rear-entry, deep penetration, orgasm, no hot
baths, and boxers. Shettles would predict this will
be a boy -- we'll see! Of course we'll be happy
with either two boys plus a baby girl, or two boys
plus a baby boy.
We tried for a girl the third time around, and ended
up with our third son. (I am dyslexic-sp?) so maybe
I did it backwards?! Anyway be assured that whatever
the sex it's great having another baby.
1st two babies: had intercourse when ovulation kit
said I was ovulating. (So we inadvertently used the
timing scheme for the Shettle's method for having
boys.) Both pregnancies started on first month of
trying. Results: boys
3rd baby: Had read Shettles' book. Used only the
TIMING part of the Shettles method for having a
girl. Tried to use the "no orgasm for the woman"
part but declined using it on the particular day
that we conceived. Used VERY conservative timing ---
intercourse 3 to 4 days before ovulation. Took 7
months to get pregnant. Result: girl
1. Did you want to try to get a boy or a girl with
any pregnancy, in advance of conception?
Yes. I had a boy, and wanted a girl.
2. Did you try any (or all) of the techniques
outlined by Dr. Shettles in his book? If so, which
ones? Please describe.
Mainly the vinegar douche, and timing conception.
This was 23 years ago, so I cannot remember the
details. I don't think I knew my cycles were
longer, and therefore, I ovulated longer. For me, I
think the Vinegar made me too acidic, and therefore
killed the sperm. We tried for 9 months. The one
time I did not douche, we got pregnant, and guess
what, a wonderful son, who is now an adult !! Sigh.
Never did have that daughter...
3. Did you try any other techniques besides those
in the Shettles book?
No.
4. Did you get pregnant as a result? What gender
was the fetus or baby (or babies, if multiples)?
Yes, a wonderful son.
5. Did you find that any of Shettles' (or other)
methods presented any difficulties for you or your
partner? Please describe.
Douching is a pain in the neck. And the highly
acidic vaginal pH has not been discussed.
6. Overall, would you say you were satisfied with
the whole thing? (Did you get the "outcome" that
you wanted?)
Nope, did not get my daughter, but we love our son.
I guess I was just slated to have sons...I wish the
results were more dependable...
For any future reference ... the Shettles methods
ring true for us. In trying to fall pregnant we
timed intercourse with ovulation exactly (I knew my
body pretty well by this stage through BBT, mucous
etc) and when we FINALLY achieved pregnancy we had
our precious little boy. After this we were unsure
that we would be able to achieve another pregnancy
but were not concerned. As I had no period between
the birth of number 1 and our second baby its hard
to tell when ovulation occured but we had a girl.
Interestingly the diet mentioned is so true for me!
When we conceived our son I was eating foods high in
salt, savoury etc and when we conceived our daughter
my diet consisted heavily of dairy products,and
calcium rich foods (as I was breastfeeding our baby
at the time) Oh yeh, the sex positions also seem to
tally! Alot of couples we know who have had problems
falling pregnant and finally do, have ALL had baby
boys (5), they time intercourse with ovulation
pretty closely to have the best posible chance of
falling pregnant.
Authors
Weinberg CR. Baird DD. Wilcox AJ.
Title
The sex of the baby may be related to the length
of the follicular phase in the conception cycle.
Source
Human Reproduction. 10(2):304-7, 1995 Feb.
MeSH Subject Headings
Adult, Cohort Studies, Female, *Follicular
Phase, Human, Infant, Newborn, Male, Pregnancy,
Prospective Studies, *Sex Determination, Time
Factors
Abstract:
"In a prospective study of normal couples
discontinuing contraception to begin a
pregnancy, the days of ovulation were estimated
by hormonal assay of daily urine specimens. No
hormonal interventions were used. Length of the
follicular phase (from onset of menses to
ovulation) was found to be related to the sex of
the baby among 133 pregnancies that survived to
delivery. Conception cycles with short
follicular phases (early ovulation) tended to
produce boys, while those with long follicular
phases tended to produce girls. This
relationship is consistent with other data and
could explain sex-related differences in the
length of gestation and the observed excess of
same-sex pairs among dizygotic twins."
I happened to ovulate two days late when I conceived
my [baby], though.
After getting different nonsensical news reports
about the New England Journal of Medicine article,
I went and got the real thing. The study was done
with fertile couples only. They tried to answer 4
questions:
[first three snipped] and (4) can a couple influence
the sex of the baby by altering the time of
intercourse.
They also didn't find any correlation between timing
of intercourse and sex of the child. So much for
the idea that the guy sperm swim faster than the gal
sperm (or vice versa?): at least not enough to
matter in the uterus under "normal" conditions.
By the way, they monitored the couples in the study
quite closely and estimated time of ovulation based
on chemicals in the daily urine specimens.
I'm not an expert on all of this by any means, but
this article is fairly straightforward.
[A.J. Wilcox, C.R. Weinberg, D.D. Baird (1995)
Timing of sexual intercourse in relation to
ovulation--Effects on the probability of conception,
survival of the pregnancy, and sex of the baby. NEJM
vol. 333 no. 23, pp. 1517-21. Pub. date 12/7/95].
There's an accompanying editorial pp. 1563-1564.
[Again, this is a FAQ that's still in progress --
please let me hear from you at
rah@gvsu.edu
if you have anything to contribute -- thanks!!]
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