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Week by Week

Twas the Night Before Christmas

TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS
AND UP ON OB
A NURSE YELLED "THICK MEC, I NEED A DELEE"

IV'S WITH PITOCIN
WERE ALL HUNG WITH CARE
IN HOPES THEY'LL DELIVER
AND STOP PULLING THEIR HAIR

THE WOMEN WERE SCREAMING
IN THEIR BIRTHING BEDS
WHILE VISIONS OF EPIDURALS
DANCED IN THEIR HEADS

THE STAFFING IS SHORT
WITH NO ONE ON CALL
EVERY WARMER IS DIRTY
AND SITS IN THE HALL

JUST WHEN I THOUGHT
THERE'S AN END TO THIS HELL
THE PATIENT IN TRIAGE
HAS A MAJOR DECEL

SO WE RUSH WITH A GURNEY
AND RACE TO THE BACK
THE O.R. IS DIRTY
NOT ONE SECTION PACK

I DROPPED TO MY KNEES
AND I STARTED TO CRY
WHEN I HEARD THE BELLS JINGLE
AND LOOKED TOWARD THE SKY

THERE WAS ST. NICK
ON HIS SLEIGH IN THE REAR
HE HAD SIX SMILING NURSES
THE NIGHT SHIFT IS HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!